Living In The Worst Case Scenario: How To Talk To Children About Gun Violence

Written By Bird Treacy

Originally published on “Bird’s Blog” for St. John the Evangelist, Hingham on May 25, 2022, following the acts of gun violence in Buffalo, NY and Uvalde, TX. Unfortunately, it is a resource we frequently need.

As Christians, we sometimes say that we live in a broken world, but perhaps it is more accurate to say that this world breaks our hearts. And when it breaks our hearts, we are called to respond with action - and the first action we can take is to talk to those we love:

A screenshot from the blackliturgies Instagram. It reads "I prayed for twenty years but I received no answer until I prayed with my legs. - Frederick Douglass" against a brown background.

How do we talk about gun violence, especially school shootings, with children? These resources may be able to help:

  • “Helping Children with Tragic Events in the News” from the Fred Rogers Institute
    This post shared by PBS includes a number of valuable resources for navigating frightening events, especially with our youngest children. In particular, it emphasizes ways we can focus on building a sense of security in play and in our relationships more generally.

  • “What to say to kids when the news is scary” from NPR
    I find this NPR article valuable because of its guiding questions. While we can limit what media children are exposed to, gun violence dominates the headlines and the older children get, the more that they hear. At the heart of things is this question: What have you heard and how are you feeling? We can’t barricade children from the world, but we can help them navigate it.

  • “A Kids Book About School Shootings” by Crystal Woodman Miller
    A Kids Co. offers a variety of books for addressing complex situations and feelings, and this particular book is authored by a mental health advocate and Columbine survivor. You can hear her read the book here, and she emphasizes that such shootings are really rare (especially in elementary schools), despite the way the news can make us feel, and how we can help children develop internal resources for managing their emotions.

  • We can’t talk responsibly about gun violence, especially the recent shootings in Buffalo and Uvalde, without also talking about racism. Some vital books on this topic include “Something Happened in Our Town” by Ann Hazard, Marianne Celano, and Marietta Collins, which is read beautifully here through the Niagara Falls Underground Railroad Heritage Center.

  • Because we are part of a predominately white community, it falls on us to consider what our relationship is to race and racism. One of the most vital books for children in this regard is “Not My Idea” by Anastasia Higginbotham. Our children need to know that they may not be responsible for the history of racial injustice and the resulting violence, but they can be leaders in stopping this pattern of harm.

All of this is just a start, but a start is important. May we pray with our words and with our legs. May we be God’s hands and feet in the world.

Bird Treacy